Receiving Feedback

see > ‘giving and receiving feedback

Receiving Feedback is as insanely important as giving it.

Here’s how you do it.

Ready ?

SHUT UP.
STOP TALKING.
LISTEN. 

Let the other person speak, and/or demonstrate what’s going on for them. Do not interrupt. Do not engage in defending your position. Don’t get defensive. Do not let your ego get in the way of hearing what you need to hear right now. One of the best things that you can do for you, and the people that you dance with is be humble, gracious, kind, clear, and most of all be quiet when receiving feedback.

To be clear, listening is a highly undervalued skill in today’s world, we want to talk so that we can confirm that we’re on the right page and to seem like, as if, we’re knowledgeable. You do not want to do this. Instead use your ears, use your eyes, be silent, and listen. 

At the same time, it wouldn’t kill your ego to ask for feedback now and again. And while most Followers do this, not enough Leads engage in this practice.

Engage in the active practice of asking for feedback, and then…here’s the hard part – RECEIVE it!

MORE REMINDERS

Fear of Milonga

The fact is that some folks have a justifiable fear of Milonga! No not the dance party, nor the music at the milonga, no…this fear refers to the abject fear that is expressed by some people when Milonga music is played because now they must dance ‘Milonga’ moves to milonga music. The reason ? Either it’s the speed at which it is seemingly danced, or the music that is perceived to be ‘fast’, movements/steps/patterns/figures that are associated and specific to Milonga. Some people just freak right out when it comes to milonga. Some people actually break out in a cold sweat at the very thought of it, Lead or Follow.

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The Seasoned Dancer

The dancer who has been dancing for a certain amount of time has passed through the multiple, multiple flirtations. They’ve had the flirtations that lead to attractions, and then the attractions that turn into dalliances, and some that go beyond that.

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The ‘Connection’ Fallacy

Connection” is a wonderful idea. We like to believe in the romanticism of this word, and all that it implies, which is as it turns out a considerable amount. However, the word itself, from a Tango perspective, has been beat up and bruised that it more than likely has lost it’s original intent. When you say the word to someone it could mean any one of eight (8) different things as it relates to the dance. However, this is not a definition of the word, for that please see the Tango Topics Definition of the word "Connection". 


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The Waiter Hand

Another one that you’re going to see a lot of is the Lead who places his palm upward, flat, and outwards, sometimes fingers outstretched as if they were a waiter serving drinks at an upscale bar. The elbow is dropped, and the hand is well below shoulder level.

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Proprioception

According to Webster’s Dictionary the word ‘Proprioception’ comes from the latin word ‘proprius’ meaning “one’s own” or “individual”, and ‘capio’ or ‘capere’ meaning to take or to grasp. The word itself means a perception of one’s own body in space and time, as in the awareness of one’s body in space and time, as it refers to bodily position in space and time.

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Tango Accents

You may not realize this but you have an accent. The place that you live in, the people that you dance with, the teachers that you have studied with, and last but not least, the variation of those ideas from the original, creates a local tango ‘accent’. Every city where Tango is danced has an accent which is specific to that place and to that place alone. Boston, San Francisco, Paris, London, Berlin, Moscow, etc. They all have one, up to and including Buenos Aires, especially Buenos Aires! The difference between your local flavor of Tango and say Boston, Paris, and London, is like night and day within a spectrum of ideas.

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Learning The Other Side

Let’s get right to the heart of the question, "Why on earth would anyone want to learn the other side of the embrace ?". The answer to that question is actually not a singular answer, there are actually 5 good reasons why you learn the other role that you may or may not disagree with. They are as follows:

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10 REASONS TO SUBSCRIBE

There are 4 Levels of Access: Free, Basic, Premium, and Premium+. Free pays nothing but gets a perk just for signing up. 

1.) Free Users get to see 5 of the 125 Different Tango Topics on the site. Plus you get access to the entire Tango Reminders and Tango Ideas sections of the site. These are short form Topic descriptors with a little detail about the topic and the video.

2.) 
Basic and Premium users Save A BOATLOAD of MONEY! Buying this stuff outright is expensive.

3.) Basic, Premium, and Premium+ users get access to the ALL ARTICLES and THE FULL ARTICLE which you can’t see right now.

4.) Basic, Premium, and Premium+ users have way better video resolution: Free = 420p, Basic = 720p, Premium = 1080p and 4K. 

5.) Basic, Premium, and Premium+ users get the ‘Dancing Perspectives’ & ‘The Soup’ sections of the document you just read (Lead, Follow, and Dancing) which are open to you. And that’s where all the good stuff is at. 

6.) Video Downloads! 

7.) Access to the Tango Topics Music Library (22 Curated Golden Age Orchestras)

8.) Access to ‘Tango Del Dia’ – Our Music Education System with access to 14 Days of Music, 30 Days of Music Education, and 30 More Days of Tango Del Dia. 

9.) We explain things, break the vocabulary down in a visual way, from multiple angles, showing feet, hands, and close ups! Yes there’s a lot of talking but we want you to understand what it is that you’re doing and why, not just steps, patterns, and figure

and #10:
No more annoying ads at the bottom of the page, begging you to subscribe! 

Keep something in the back of your mind: What you’re seeing in a youtube video is a couple that is performing for the 15th row for a room full of people. They’re not social dancingWhereas this website is all about ‘Social Tango’  or how to make things function on a social dance floor. Social Dance floor ? Your local milonga! They are showing you flashy moves as a presentation, to show off! But not stopping and talking about how this works which is what you need to see. This website and all of it’s content show you the how and  why you’d want to put that piece of vocabulary there, or how to make things work. This website is all about those things and more!

You could watch Tango YouTube videos and thereby spend your time, trying to infer, and figure out how things may work in that particular situation. Bend your body this way or that, twist and force this position or that. Place your foot here or there and figure it out. This is known as Tango Twister.  Which can be a lot of fun, but more than likely it won’t help you, because you’re missing something: The explanation from an experienced teacher showing you how to properly excute this stuff from a Leading Perspective as well as from a Following Perspective!

The goal of YouTube videos is to get you to study with those teachers in person. The goal of Tango Topics videos allows you to work at your own pace, in the comfort of your own space, so that you can play them over and over again to improve your understanding of the vocabulary or technique being described to therefore better your dancing experience. The goal of classes and workshops is to get you to come back over and over and over again, thereby spending more money with that teacher. This website and the videos under it are here to act as a resource for you to help you to improve your dance. Pay once and you’re done.

Eventually, one way or another you’re going to pay for this lesson, either here and now, or with them. TANSTAAFL! The difference between that lesson and this ? Is that you get to play this lesson over and over and over again. Further still, there are supporting materials (other videos) that help to explain the language and the underlying technique of how and why things work, so you can easily reference those things in the corresponding articles that go with the material, and or any language in the Tango Topics Dictionary. 

DROP ME A MSG HERE

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