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Receiving Feedback

see > ‘giving and receiving feedback‘

Receiving Feedback is as insanely important as giving it.

Here’s how you do it.

Ready ?

SHUT UP.
STOP TALKING.
LISTEN. 

Let the other person speak, and/or demonstrate what’s going on for them. Do not interrupt. Do not engage in defending your position. Don’t get defensive. Do not let your ego get in the way of hearing what you need to hear right now. One of the best things that you can do for you, and the people that you dance with is be humble, gracious, kind, clear, and most of all be quiet when receiving feedback.

To be clear, listening is a highly undervalued skill in today’s world, we want to talk so that we can confirm that we’re on the right page and to seem like, as if, we’re knowledgeable. You do not want to do this. Instead use your ears, use your eyes, be silent, and listen. 

At the same time, it wouldn’t kill your ego to ask for feedback now and again. And while most Followers do this, not enough Leads engage in this practice.

Engage in the active practice of asking for feedback, and then…here’s the hard part – RECEIVE it!

MORE REMINDERS

The Same People

January 26, 2017 No Comments

You have local friends that you have acquired through the dance. They met you at a very specific point in your tango development. You’ve danced with them over and over again. You almost never say ‘no’ to them because they’re fun to dance with or they’re nice people. Over time you settle into a nice, almost comfortable routine of your dancing friends, where you’ll go to the practica or milonga,

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Facility

January 18, 2018 No Comments

“Facility can be, but is not limited to, Familiarity with Vocabulary, Execution of the Vocabulary, also it’s about Balance, Equilibrium, Kinesthetic Awareness, Kinesthetic Listening, The Neurology of Leading, The Neurology of Following (which is how you respond to something from a follower’s perspective), Proprioception, and last but not least Extending Your Capabilities. We’ll get to that last one in just a bit. Two of the more common aspects of Facility are Execution and Proprioception. So let’s quickly review what Tango Topics means when it refers to these ideas…“

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The Powerful Follower

August 15, 2018 No Comments

What is a Powerful Follower ? A Follower that has first and foremost a.) the force of the Follower’s muscles (legs – quads & glutes specifically) engaging with acceleration, power, and strength….

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Learning The Other Side

May 15, 2018 No Comments

Let’s get right to the heart of the question, "Why on earth would anyone want to learn the other side of the embrace ?". The answer to that question is actually not a singular answer, there are actually 5 good reasons why you learn the other role that you may or may not disagree with. They are as follows:

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Compression

November 26, 2016 No Comments

‘Compression’ means that you’re either pulling your partner into you and/or at the same time restricting their movements in a myriad of ways (hand, arm, head). As a Lead this typically manifests itself with your right forearm. As a Follower compression is typically done with your left forearm around your lead’s shoulder (tsk, tsk, tsk, it should not be there).  

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Architecture

January 16, 2017 No Comments

Architecture. There are certain things we want to do with our bodies in relation to Argentine Tango and Social Dancing, one of them is to ‘close our fingers’ or bring our fingers together in every possible place where we lay our hands on our partners or they come into contact with our partner’s bodies.

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Moscow For Leads

February 5, 2017 No Comments

There’s a row of women sitting in Moscow (usually several rows deep actually). Only these rows…are every Lead’s fantasy! Yup. Truth. Let’s get something straight. The food is awful. It’s usually effing cold anytime after september and before june. Getting in an out of Moscow (Russia) isn’t exactly a piece of cake (for an American), there are hoops to jump through (read that as VISA issues). It is not exactly cheap. And there is rampant crime in ways you can’t even begin to imagine.

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Giving Up Tango

April 29, 2017 No Comments

There comes a point in your Tango life for one of several reasons where you find yourself in an odd place – the want to give up Tango. The most common reason is that you’re just not getting the same thing from the dance as you used to get from it. You go to Milongas. You find yourself sitting more, talking more, and dancing less.

Read More »

La Cumparsita

October 8, 2017 No Comments

At the end of nearly every Milonga in the world, that you will ever attend, while you will hear more than a few familiar songs, there are a handful that have very specific meanings. One of them is played at the end of the night to signify that the Milonga has come to end, which should be a cue to find your favorite partner and to dance with them. The song ? “La Cumparsita” or as it is translated into English, ‘The Little Carnival’.

Read More »

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1.) Free Users get to see 5 of the 125 Different Tango Topics on the site. Plus you get access to the entire Tango Reminders and Tango Ideas sections of the site. These are short form Topic descriptors with a little detail about the topic and the video.

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5.) Basic, Premium, and Premium+ users get the ‘Dancing Perspectives’ & ‘The Soup’ sections of the document you just read (Lead, Follow, and Dancing) which are open to you. And that’s where all the good stuff is at. 

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Keep something in the back of your mind: What you’re seeing in a youtube video is a couple that is performing for the 15th row for a room full of people. They’re not social dancing! Whereas this website is all about ‘Social Tango’  or how to make things function on a social dance floor. Social Dance floor ? Your local milonga! They are showing you flashy moves as a presentation, to show off! But not stopping and talking about how this works which is what you need to see. This website and all of it’s content show you the how and  why you’d want to put that piece of vocabulary there, or how to make things work. This website is all about those things and more!

You could watch Tango YouTube videos and thereby spend your time, trying to infer, and figure out how things may work in that particular situation. Bend your body this way or that, twist and force this position or that. Place your foot here or there and figure it out. This is known as Tango Twister.  Which can be a lot of fun, but more than likely it won’t help you, because you’re missing something: The explanation from an experienced teacher showing you how to properly excute this stuff from a Leading Perspective as well as from a Following Perspective!

The goal of YouTube videos is to get you to study with those teachers in person. The goal of Tango Topics videos allows you to work at your own pace, in the comfort of your own space, so that you can play them over and over again to improve your understanding of the vocabulary or technique being described to therefore better your dancing experience. The goal of classes and workshops is to get you to come back over and over and over again, thereby spending more money with that teacher. This website and the videos under it are here to act as a resource for you to help you to improve your dance. Pay once and you’re done.

Eventually, one way or another you’re going to pay for this lesson, either here and now, or with them. TANSTAAFL! The difference between that lesson and this ? Is that you get to play this lesson over and over and over again. Further still, there are supporting materials (other videos) that help to explain the language and the underlying technique of how and why things work, so you can easily reference those things in the corresponding articles that go with the material, and or any language in the Tango Topics Dictionary. 

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