Being Criticized

Most people don’t enjoy being criticized about anything at all. Think about it for a moment, do you actually enjoy someone telling you that you’re screwing up ? No. Probably not. Now we add Argentine Tango into the equation, and someone criticizing you for your lack of X, Y, and Z and it generally makes for a less-than-desirable emotionally rough situation. Most people will feel uncomfortable, ignorant, and embarrassed, and then want to hide in the closet until the storm passes. 

Erroneously criticism of any kind, with regards to Argentine Tango, is attributed to ‘perfectionism’.  It’s not ‘perfectionism’, it is honesty. And that honesty is absolutely required so that one may improve.

The truth is that this is critical feedback, about what you’re doing and how you’re doing it. Hopefully that critical feedback or criticism is done with exacting detail, which is needed for analysis, breakdown, and then reconstruction or rebuilding your posture, walk, embrace, vocabulary, and/or musical interpretation. Without that critical feedback, you will continue to make the same mistakes over and over again thinking that everything is happy and lovely when in fact it’s not. Put another way that without that feedback you’re living in an echo chamber of “you’re doing good”, “that’s fabulous”, and “well done”. However, when you go out social dancing, you’ll find that you will end up sitting most of the night for a variety of reasons because the echo chamber doesn’t match up with the reality of social dancing. 

Essentially you want an honest assessment of your skills, honest feedback, clear, direct, clean, and dispassionate feedback about where you are, and what you’re doing. This is being criticized. 🙂

Unfortunately most people, when they hear the words “Criticize” or “Critical Feedback”, they immediately turn off and disengage. They take it as a personal attack on them as a person, and not about what they’re doing. It’s negative instead of seen as room for improvement. People only want to hear how well they’re doing (especially North Americans!).

So getting Critical Feedback and being criticized is absolutely required to improve your dance.

Anything else is a waste of your time towards improvement. 

MORE REMINDERS

Learning The Other Side

Let’s get right to the heart of the question, "Why on earth would anyone want to learn the other side of the embrace ?". The answer to that question is actually not a singular answer, there are actually 5 good reasons why you learn the other role that you may or may not disagree with. They are as follows:

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Tango Cities

Today’s Tango Thought covers a labor of Tantalus … where is Tango danced and in what cities ? What follows is by no means an exhaustive list of places where tango is danced, it only scratches the surface.

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The Follower’s Work

The Follower’s Work. These words may come as a surprise to you dear reader considering that this page has seemingly ‘bashed’ or disparaged the role of the Follow in any number of ways, however: The role of the Follower is work. This is by no means a complete list, but just a taste: A Follower must master in order to ‘dance’ with a particular Lead their stability, their walk backwards, and forwards to the side without wobbling.

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The ‘D’ Word

At the beginning of our Tango lives, most of us who start out taking a weekly series to get our feet wet, just so that we can say we ‘learned’ to tango. If only that were the end of it. It’s not. The classes never stop really. If you want to improve. If you want to get better and better dances with better partners, then you need to improve.

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The Same People

You have local friends that you have acquired through the dance. They met you at a very specific point in your tango development. You’ve danced with them over and over again. You almost never say ‘no’ to them because they’re fun to dance with or they’re nice people. Over time you settle into a nice, almost comfortable routine of your dancing friends, where you’ll go to the practica or milonga,

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Giving Feedback

This is probably one the most important things in Argentine Tango that you can do for yourself and the people that you dance with. Giving constructive, clear, concise, clean, direct, and most of all, honest feedback. It is what is required. While feedback is subjective, it is not personal, it’s what is going on for you in the construct of the dance, the walk, the embrace, and how someone moves in relation to you.

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The Row of Women That Sit

They’re at every milonga in the world (with an exception or two – Russia & Asia). Every. Milonga. THAT row of women, of a certain age, and a certain disposition, that for a few valid reasons (pretty or not) who are sitting, and not by choice. Most have been sitting for more than an hour or two.

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Keep something in the back of your mind: What you’re seeing in a youtube video is a couple that is performing for the 15th row for a room full of people. They’re not social dancingWhereas this website is all about ‘Social Tango’  or how to make things function on a social dance floor. Social Dance floor ? Your local milonga! They are showing you flashy moves as a presentation, to show off! But not stopping and talking about how this works which is what you need to see. This website and all of it’s content show you the how and  why you’d want to put that piece of vocabulary there, or how to make things work. This website is all about those things and more!

You could watch Tango YouTube videos and thereby spend your time, trying to infer, and figure out how things may work in that particular situation. Bend your body this way or that, twist and force this position or that. Place your foot here or there and figure it out. This is known as Tango Twister.  Which can be a lot of fun, but more than likely it won’t help you, because you’re missing something: The explanation from an experienced teacher showing you how to properly excute this stuff from a Leading Perspective as well as from a Following Perspective!

The goal of YouTube videos is to get you to study with those teachers in person. The goal of Tango Topics videos allows you to work at your own pace, in the comfort of your own space, so that you can play them over and over again to improve your understanding of the vocabulary or technique being described to therefore better your dancing experience. The goal of classes and workshops is to get you to come back over and over and over again, thereby spending more money with that teacher. This website and the videos under it are here to act as a resource for you to help you to improve your dance. Pay once and you’re done.

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