LIstening (Following)

There is a belief that Following is really easy. It’s a snap. Most male Leads believe this fantasy because the better Followers that they’ve had the pleasure to dance with are really easy to lead (the action, not the person) so therefore it’s just easy in their minds. It’s effortless. Until they do the job themselves and then it’s all hands on deck and they realize that what they thought was easy is not easy, it’s hard work. All of this is made even more challenging by the 3 facts: 1.) The Lead’s embrace is usually constrictive, and restrictive, compressive, and sometimes even painful.  2.) The Lead’s choice of vocabulary is usually something that is rushed, poorly executed, and usually too rough on the Follower.  and 3.) The musical execution of those vocabulary choices. All 3 of those things have to work while the Follower’s technique must be sharp, clean, clear, elegant, and seemingly effortless. 

Following is not easy, not by any stretch of the imagination. One thing that makes the job very challenging aside from the 3 things above: Listening. This is not listening as in auditory sound, but rather in feeling. The tactile pressures of the physiological contact of skin to fabric or skin to skin in all of 5 of the major contact points of Argentine Tango. a.) Hand to Hand. b.) Arm to Arm. c.) Hand to Spinal Column. d.) Arm to Back. and e.) Torso to Torso. In all 5 of those contact points the Follower is listening, feeling, for minute changes in physiological pressures to ‘hear’ or feel an indication that X is going to happen.

Frequently, however, they are pushed, pulled, compressed, forced really to do X, Y, and Z when they’re not moving from a stable position, so ‘hearing’ anything at that point is nearly impossible as they’re just trying to survive not falling all over themselves. 

MORE REMINDERS

Facility

“Facility can be, but is not limited to, Familiarity with Vocabulary, Execution of the Vocabulary, also it’s about Balance, Equilibrium, Kinesthetic Awareness, Kinesthetic Listening, The Neurology of Leading, The Neurology of Following (which is how you respond to something from a follower’s perspective), Proprioception, and last but not least Extending Your Capabilities. We’ll get to that last one in just a bit. Two of the more common aspects of Facility are Execution and Proprioception. So let’s quickly review what Tango Topics means when it refers to these ideas…“

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Variation

Repetition is only good in horseshoes and hand grenades. Which is to say, that no one, absolutely no one, likes being led to the same thing over and over and over again. Variation is the key to success! Small variation, large variations that open doors to other ideas, other thoughts. But in the end, variation. Taking an idea and then reversing it, or slowing it down, speeding it up, speeding up a part of it (musically), slowing down a piece of it, taking off the beginning or the end and reversing their positions. This is variation.

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The Blame Game

The dance starts out on an even footing. It’s quite clear two steps later that one of you is clearly better than the other. Usually the Lead believes that they’re all that, and the Follower is just trying to survive the compressive embrace, let alone actually dance. In reality…well let’s just say that no one is perfect and leave it at that, shall we ?

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The Walking Debate

A good portion of Follower’s close their eyes while dancing. The Lead, obviously, can’t close their eyes, but they do cast their eyes towards the floor to watch their Follower’s feet (tsk, tsk, tsk). They close their eyes for a variety of reasons: 1.) To be able to concentrate better. 2.) To ‘feel’ their partner in a more ‘connected’ way. 3.) To not be so distracted by the rest of the room. 4.) To feel more intimate. 5.) To tune out.

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Spectrum of Ideas.

Because there are no ‘Standards & Practices’ in Tango, therefore ‘Right’/’Wrong’ are subjective, which are for the most part, based on your teacher’s point of view of how things should be done. And as a result you, the unwitting student, take one those ideas as your own because you believe that because X is teaching that they must be the soul of all wisdom. Very infrequently do tango teachers teach a fair and balanced, or well rounded point of view. They usually teach what their subscribe to in their Tango world view, what they agree with, and what their teacher showed them. Very infrequently will they teach something that is outside that world view.

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Watching The Feet

Put simply – If you can see your partner’s feet while dancing with them…there’s a problem. The problem ? Well actually there are several that you’re completely unaware of, below are just a few of them….

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The ‘Connection’ Fallacy

“Connection” is a wonderful idea. We like to believe in the romanticism of this word, and all that it implies, which is as it turns out a considerable amount. However, the word itself, from a Tango perspective, has been beat up and bruised that it more than likely has lost it’s original intent. When you say the word to someone it could mean any one of eight (8) different things as it relates to the dance. However, this is not a definition of the word, for that please see the Tango Topics Definition of the word "Connection". 


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Cake!

Should you eat before, or after a milonga, or not at all ? Some people say “before, so that you don’t get hungry during the milonga”. But then they complain that they can’t move as freely. Some people say “After! Because I’ll be ravenous”. But then these same people quite factually ‘grumble’ (meaning their stomachs are growling because they’re hungry) while they dance with you. Some people are in the ‘not’ at all category! They can seemingly contain their exertion and not require sustenance before, during, and after a milonga.

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Architecture

Architecture. There are certain things we want to do with our bodies in relation to Argentine Tango and Social Dancing, one of them is to ‘close our fingers’ or bring our fingers together in every possible place where we lay our hands on our partners or they come into contact with our partner’s bodies.

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Rejection

What follows relates to the verbal ask for a dance and the rejection, this thought does not talk about the reject from a failed cabeceo or mirada. Let’s lay out some facts before we get to the heart of this stuff. Fact: The ask, no matter how ‘sly’ you think you’re being, is going to be awkward.

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Keep something in the back of your mind: What you’re seeing in a youtube video is a couple that is performing for the 15th row for a room full of people. They’re not social dancing! Whereas this website is all about ‘Social Tango’  or how to make things function on a social dance floor. Social Dance floor ? Your local milonga! They are showing you flashy moves as a presentation, to show off! But not stopping and talking about how this works which is what you need to see. This website and all of it’s content show you the how and  why you’d want to put that piece of vocabulary there, or how to make things work. This website is all about those things and more!

You could watch Tango YouTube videos and thereby spend your time, trying to infer, and figure out how things may work in that particular situation. Bend your body this way or that, twist and force this position or that. Place your foot here or there and figure it out. This is known as Tango Twister.  Which can be a lot of fun, but more than likely it won’t help you, because you’re missing something: The explanation from an experienced teacher showing you how to properly excute this stuff from a Leading Perspective as well as from a Following Perspective!

The goal of YouTube videos is to get you to study with those teachers in person. The goal of Tango Topics videos allows you to work at your own pace, in the comfort of your own space, so that you can play them over and over again to improve your understanding of the vocabulary or technique being described to therefore better your dancing experience. The goal of classes and workshops is to get you to come back over and over and over again, thereby spending more money with that teacher. This website and the videos under it are here to act as a resource for you to help you to improve your dance. Pay once and you’re done.

Eventually, one way or another you’re going to pay for this lesson, either here and now, or with them. TANSTAAFL! The difference between that lesson and this ? Is that you get to play this lesson over and over and over again. Further still, there are supporting materials (other videos) that help to explain the language and the underlying technique of how and why things work, so you can easily reference those things in the corresponding articles that go with the material, and or any language in the Tango Topics Dictionary. 

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